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Thread: Copied from the 'net.

  1. #1
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    Default Copied from the 'net.

    Venison vs. Beef: The controversy is FINALLY settled..!

    Controversy has long raged about the relative quality and taste of venison and beef as gourmet foods. Some people say venison is tough, with a strong "wild" taste. Others insist venison's flavor is delicate. An independent food research group was retained by the Venison Council to conduct a taste test to determine the truth of these conflicting assertions once and for all.

    First, a Grade A Choice Hereford steer was chased into a swamp a mile and a half from a road and shot several times. After some of the entrails were removed, the carcass was dragged back over rocks and logs, and through mud and dust to the road. It was then thrown into the back of a pickup truck and driven through rain and snow for 100 miles to the nearest bar. After several hours of "bragging time", it was transported to a tree behind a house where it hung out in the sun for a day.

    It was then lugged into a garage where it was skinned and rolled around on the greasy floor for a while. Strict sanitary precautions were observed throughout the test, within the limitations of the butchering environment. For instance, dogs and cats were allowed to sniff and lick the steer carcass, but most of the time were chased away, along with the pesky flies, when they attempted to bite chunks out of it.

    Next, a sheet of plywood left from last year's butchering was set up in the basement on two saw horses. The pieces of dried blood, hair and fat left from last year were scraped off with a wire brush last used to clean out the grass stuck under the lawn mower.

    The skinned carcass was then dragged down the steps into the basement where several inexperienced but enthusiastic and intoxicated men worked on it with meat saws, cleavers, hammers and dull knives while watching a football game on a small TV. The result was 375 pounds of soup bones, four bushel baskets of meat scraps, three badly cut and bleeding fingers, and a half dozen steaks that were an eighth of an inch thick on one edge and an inch and a half thick on the other edge.

    The steaks were seared on a glowing red hot cast iron skillet to lock in the flavor. When the smoke cleared, rancid bacon grease was added, along with three pounds of onions, and the whole conglomeration was fried for twenty more minutes.

    The meat was gently teased from the frying pan and served to three intoxicated and blindfolded taste panel volunteers. Every member of the panel thought it was venison. One volunteer even said it tasted exactly like the venison he has eaten in hunting camps for the past 27 years.

    The results of this scientific test conclusively show that there is absolutely no difference between the taste of beef and venison...!!





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  2. #2
    Super Moderator Arrow Splitter's Avatar
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    Now that was funny! LOL

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  3. #3
    Senior Member wscywabbit's Avatar
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    Sounds vaguely familiar... I may have seen this done with deer a couple hundred times! LOL
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  4. #4
    Senior Member ElkSlayer's Avatar
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    Thats the way to do it ....LMAO
    It's all fun an games till you put that big boy on the ground.. now its time to get to work
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  5. #5
    Senior Member Mike G's Avatar
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    That is funny .....

    The problem is I think that's how some ignorant people, or should I say "misinformed people", actually view us deer hunters.

    I honestly prefer eating venison over beef any day. Venison needs to be cooked medium rare to medium, that's where the taste and tenderness is. Oh yes, it must be cared for correctly from the very beginning.

    Great ... now I'm hungry.
    Last edited by Arrow Splitter; 01-16-2013 at 02:52 PM. Reason: swearing

  6. #6
    String builder/ Super Moderator Hutch~n~Son Archery's Avatar
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    Stop it all of you I am hungry! and I have no venison.





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  7. #7
    Senior Member gravedigger's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hutch~n~Son Archery View Post
    Stop it all of you I am hungry! and I have no venison.





    Hutch
    well drag a moo cow around through all that nasty stuff and you will,lmao

  8. #8
    String builder/ Super Moderator Hutch~n~Son Archery's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by gravedigger View Post
    well drag a moo cow around through all that nasty stuff and you will,lmao
    That GD would be too easy! Ha! But fun.




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